It was a dangerous day in the grocery store
much busier than I’ve seen it before
folks backed up on aisle nine
trying to get to the chips and the beer and the wine
I was dodgin’ and duckin’ cuttin’ left and right
All masked up and ready for a fight
My grocery cart was filled to the brim
with toilet paper, sanitizer, whiskey and gin
when I made my move down the doughnut aisle
but I was stopped in my tracks by a woman and her child
I had to decide whether to turn around
‘cause they were wearing their masks halfway down
CHORUS 1
Below the nose, even under the chin
shedding’ the virus right off of the skin
It’s like a plumber’s butt you don’t give a f**k
and you look like a clown
When you wear you mask
halfway down
So I pulled a wheelie and spun around
made a quick detour I was checkout bound
gave up on the doughnuts but grabbed some chips
quesadilla, cheese, salsa and dip
No time for eating’ healthy these days
the produce aisle is a coviddy maze
Got in line socially distanced we spread
6 feet behind me and 6 feet ahead ahead
When all of a sudden this guy walks by
asked if we’re all waiting in line
we all froze up - My heart began to pound
‘cause he was wearing his mask halfway down
chorus 2
Below the nose, even under the chin
shedding’ the virus right off of the skin
It’s like a plumber’s butt you don’t give a f**k
and you look like a clown
When you wear you mask
halfway down
Finally made it outside loaded my stuff
breathed a sigh of relief when I got in my truck
Lord, all I could do was hope and pray
I didn’t get the covid in the store that day
too many spreaders walking’ around
wearing’ their masks halfway down
Below the nose, under the chin
shedding’ the virus right off of the skin
It’s like a plumber’s butt you don’t give a f**k
and you look like a clown
When you wear you mask
halfway down
halfway dawn…halfway down…..
maybe I should start getting my groceries delivered
“Hello, Instacart?”